Eclipse Phase Quotes

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Quotes from any and all Eclipse Phase games, mostly taken down by User:Beth.

Gate Crashed

Party Factors

"...we are not letting Ben sleeve in to a nuclear bomb."

-Mike

"I always back up before I go to weddings after that incident with my sister back in '57."

-Matt as Ben

"Factors are like meatsacks, only not so meaty. They're more like salad sacks."

-Steve

Winter of our Dissection

"They've left the Stargate open?"

"Yeah. You know how much those things cost? Someone is holding down the handle all night long on the big money flusher."

-Matt and Mike

"On closer inspection, the hovercraft was not full of eels."

-Steve re: an alien exiting his shuttle

"Next time we see him, he's going to be like 'I have something to say to...' BRAAAAAAAAP"

"I've got a whole clip of shut the fuck up."

-Mike and Steve re: Red Herring

Extropia Shuffle

“Mike, you just did surgery with a light machine gun.”

“Well, I’ve done it before…”

-Matt and Mike as Kim Mason

“Underwater! Duly noted. No anti-vehicular explosives.”

-Matt as Ben

“Red expects us to shoot him from a distance. He does not expect us to launch ourselves into interstellar space.”

-Matt

The Jewel of the Void

"Do my memory blades work?"

"Do they require electricity?"

"Yeah."

"No."

"But I wouldn't know this until I tried them, so I've got four flaccid blades. I keep them rolled up in a skin pouch, too."

-Brian and Matt re: the energy draining effects of a Psi-Epsilon

"Thanks for coming, it was a blast."

-Seth, just before leaving, and just after having Kryptonite detonate a suicide bomb

Smoke and Mirrors

“Just for the record, in the future, Doc is totally going to still prescribe amphetamines.”

-Mike

“Matt?”

“Yeah?”

“Matt?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re a dick.”

-Mike and Matt

Home Again

Sight Lines Part 1

"I'm waiting to meet him, she's waiting to shoot him..."

"Well, it is Sita. She could be waiting to be shot by him."

-Matt and Mike

"As you may know, there as a containment break around Earth about three and a half weeks ago."

"...No idea what you're talking about."

-Dillon and Shatner

"Don't you understand that there's something more important than profit?"

"Yes. Avoiding loss."

-Ben and Shatner

"Wait. You mean you want a space crossbow?"

"I want a space hand crossbow."

-Brian and Beth

"Wait. We're on the moon. We can jump over them."

-Ben

"I did twenty points with a fucking laser and you just did twenty points with your hand?"

-Nathan re: Doc

"That's my only question: can he work as a PA?"

-Mike re: Ben

"Viva la robolution, meatsack."

-Ben

"Apparently the thing I'm best at is speaking Turkish. Or Russian, in this case. I don't think that's going to help."

-Nathan

"You are all directed to stand down and transmit your identification codes. Surrender your weapons. Direct action heavy response teams are inbound. Failure to comply will result in a mass suppression. Restoration from backup will be at your own expense."

-Shatner over the intercom

"I think I'm going to want to get you out of my territory as soon as possible."

"...Why? What has Dylan told you about us?"

-Sandra Ruhindi and Ben immediately following a riot

Omega and Prime Part 3

"Well, you're all going to die..."

"...and?"

"You've all got backups, so this shouldn't be an issue."

"Right. It's kind of normal for us."

-Brian, Mike, Brian, Matt

Matt: "Everyone scoot down to make room for Mike P."

Beth and Matt scoot towards Mike St P to free up space. Beth hugs Matt.

Matt: "I like the new seating arrangement."

Mike St P: "I feel left out."

Beth hugs Mike St P too.

Beth: "Bitches!"

"As of this year, I have known Steve for thirty years. I thought I would get him something nice this year. Here's a skull full of vodka."

"Wow. That is a head full of vodka."

"...You gave Steve head for his birthday?"

"Distilled from grain."

"Did you just say brains?"

-Mike P, Steve, Mike St P, Steve, and Beth

"So we don't know what it is, and in all likelihood we won't know for another thirty years."

"So this is going to be a long meeting, then."

-Fan Xiang and Ben

"Three people died in the past six days."

"And this is unusual?"

"Their heads exploded."

"This is unusual."

-Brian and Beth

"Ben, you're riding in the cargo."

"Damn! Why do I always have to ride bitch?"

"That being outside the ship, ziptied to the hull."

-Mike St. P and Matt

"You're sitting there saying, 'I could be your grandfather. Why aren't you a spaceship?'"

-Mike St. P explaining Ben's failure at getting a date

"You said two orgies, right?"

"We're down to about one and a half."

"Most of my transactions are still possible."

-Doc and Captain Neeson

Long description of creepy pregnodroid.

"Axel greets her with, 'Hey, baby'."

-Mike P

"Am I the only one with the Demolitions skill?"

"No. Doc has just enough points into it to make sure he doesn't kill himself with explosives."

"Sita has no points in Demolitions to make sure she does kill herself with explosives."

-Steve, Mike St. P, and Beth

"Anytime the GM pulls out Tarot cards, I know my rolls are about to go to shit. What do you mean you pulled the Fool and Death?"

"It just means you're a dead idiot!"

-Mike St. P and Steve

"There has been damage done not to your body, but to your mind, memory, or your soul."

"All of the above."

-the Witch and Beth, of Ben

"I have more Pentacles than you."

-Ben to Sita, re: Tarot readings

"They leave behind a faintly minty, faintly citrus smell."

"So, the station cleaning snails are mojito flavored?"

"SPACE mojito."

-Brian, Doc, and Shatner

"Your party platform is booze?"

"Yeah."

"No, like, your platform itself is booze!"

-Matt, Steve, Mike St. P

"That should be our motto: 'We're not evil, see, we have alcohol!'"

-Mike St. P

"Make a moxie check."

"That's a failure of the failurith degree."

-Brian and Colin

Random Email Stuff

From: Steve Bugge Sent: Monday, September 12, 2011 4:49 PM To: 'Beth'; Michael St. Pierre Cc: Matthew St. Pierre; Michael P. Pietromonaco; Steve Bugge; Steve Bugge; Colin Booth; Brian Subject: RE: Eclipse Phase: Home Again 7

Take your Mosquito Repellent, First Aid Kit, and a Fire Extinguisher and don't plan on getting any sleep

That's for the Eclipse Phase mission

For the middle schoolers I recommend a Plasma Rifle and a Suitcase Nuke

Rangefinder Part 2

Ben, currently afflicted by the Hunger trauma: "We don't know where this Pandora Gate is going to send us. There might not be any food there!"

Matt: "Damn it, Agni got to sleeve a bomb before Ben!"

Colin: "Technically, I forked the bomb."

Steve: "Oh, we so forked!"